When an ex sends you fabulous pictures of her amazing wedding with her spectacular husband in their lavished mansion on a private island next to her garage with her brand new Mercedes to let you know she’s doing wonderfully and hopes you are too, Noisy Dove recommends the following reply:
Dear [insert name, spelled wrong],
Wow. Congratulations! I could hardly believe the pictures. It’s simply amazing. I guess what they say is true: there is someone out there for everyone. No mater who you are you can eventually find someone to marry you. It’s great to see you have yourself a little starter house and are finally gaining a little extra weight.
I can see you and your husband were wise and didn’t go for the regular big elegant wedding package. I remember you talking about how tacky cheap weddings can be. I’m glad you changed your mind. Good for you. You can use that money for the baby in six months.
So did you ever [inset something you know she didn’t accomplish].
Thanks for the update. I was just thinking the other day about [describe a run romantic time you had with “her”, her being some other chick, obviously confusing her with someone else.]
Well, wish I could have been there. Let me know about your next wedding. I’m always looking for a reason fly back there for a weekend.
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Raging Kitty